I’m scared
I’ve been over eating and haven’t weighed myself and I don’t know if I want to just fast 3 days then weigh myself or weigh myself before I fast.
Ugh such a failure
Maybe if I wasn’t so huge I’d feel better
i believe anorexia is a disease.
I don’t call myself “anorexic,” because I don’t think that I am. I hate waking up every morning and the first thing I feel and see is my fat. I am disgusted with the reflection in the mirror everyday. I didn’t wake up one morning and go “let me skip a meal.” It started slowly with over exercising and eating only 300 calories. Then one day it turned into not eating period. The feeling of not eating was indescribable, I was happy but I was so sad that I have let myself become who I am today. I am a shell of a person who used to not care about her image or what she ate. Now I can’t go one day with weighing myself or counting calories. I don’t know where I lost myself.
I want to be beautiful.
My Statistics
height:5'5
starting weight: 190
highest weight: 195 pounds
lowest weight: 151 pounds
CW:FML(updated daily)
goal weight one: 150
goal weight two: 140
goal weight three: 130
goal weight four: 120
goal weight five: 115
ultimate goal weight: around 112 pounds
last goal: keeping the weight off!
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